The Power of Friendship

The Power of Friendship: Staying Connected Across Miles**

Hello Military Families,

We are in the thick of posting season, so saying good bye is an inevitable part of the season and so it made me think about the important friendships in my life and how I maintain a strong relationship despite the distances between us.

One of my longest long distant friends lives in New Zealand. Our friendship is going on 15 years now and has seen us navigate changes in technology, crazy time differences and significant personal and world events (including earthquakes, covid, engagements and babies).

How do we keep in touch?!

Well first we made it very clear that our emails between ourselves are a space free of judgement. We do not judge ourselves, nor do we judge each other.

Sometimes in life you need someone you can just offload to. While we can’t do that in person, sometimes an email is as good as journaling and it allows me to feel heard. Those deep and meaningful emails have meant so much to me over time. When things feel too big, knowing someone somewhere will listen and tell me it’s okay, is huge.

With other friends, I actually resort to the old-fashioned snail mail. I personally find it really therapeutic to take 10mintues out of my day and put pen to paper. Nothing beats the thrill of a handwritten envelope arriving in a new post box to tell you they are thinking about you. It really is very special, and I also have found some truly gorgeous writing paper and pens, which make the whole experience feel indulgent! Never hurts to have easy gifts for people to buy you either.

Video calls

Over the last two decades, the ability to speak to people across the country and globe have definitely become easier. I personally prefer to speak to people by phone, but once in a while it is great to sit down together, see their friendly face and look at the surroundings together. Sometimes going on a walk together where the camera is facing forward allows you to talk about the here and now and share something deeply meaningful in your everyday life, just as if they were walking next to you. I love video calling a friend, putting them in my top pocket with a microphone in my ear and sharing my local area with them or wherever it is I am going). Equally love it when they are doing it too and I can sit in the comfort of my own living room, but exploring their surroundings on their daily walk. 

Messages

Random text messages are also a wonderful way to keep in touch. We all feel special when someone takes a minute to text, WhatsApp or use fb messenger. I am not on other platforms, but obviously there is snap chat etc to try out. Use one that works on Wi-Fi so that you can avoid costly international charges.

Sending mail

I talked about letter writing early on, but there are several fantastic online card distributers. One that I enjoy is ‘Moonpig.com’ they allow me to choose a card for any occasion, add a photo if I want. Edit the inside text and format the font to look a little bit like handwriting and have it mailed out anywhere in the world. The year subscription is great value for money and gives you a consistent 30% off cards in addition to any promotions they have. Funky pigeon is another one I have used and so too is Card Factory.

It can all be done from the computer or an app on your phone and you can choose the date the item is sent, so that if you are organised you can get something scheduled, and if you forget you can usually get something sent out that day, with the mailing time being your only issue. It is fantastic and can be done from the comfort of your living room without having to charge around looking for an open post office!

So there you have it, some people are meant to be in our lives. Some for a season, and some for life. It does take a little work to keep them in our lives. It won’t be the same as a coffee later that week, but it is truly special knowing that if I can’t sleep at night, someone somewhere in the world is awake and will take two minutes to be with me in a moment so I don’t need to feel alone anymore.

 Wherever we are, there will be someone who is leaving, and someone new arriving, who might just be what you need right now.

Good luck. Moving gives you the gift of new friends and hard goodbyes – reminding you of truly special moments that will be with you a lifetime, even if that friend just lasted a season.

Keep in touch!

Nicola